When it comes to censorship, Kidz Bop doesn’t just bleep bad words. They yeet entire ideas. Whether it’s downplaying heartbreak, rewriting drug references into fruit smoothies, or pretending sex doesn’t exist (or that “booty” is a state of mind), the series has been hilariously committed to rewriting the DNA of popular music.
While edits are to be expected from a children’s music franchise, these lyric changes go above and beyond. From misheard metaphors to edits that completely unravel the original meaning, here are 15 of the most ridiculous lyric changes from rap, R&B, and beyond. It’s proof that Kidz Bop lives in a world where you’re always in love, never in bed, and every night ends with a dance party.
1. Old Town Road – Lil Nas X
They ditched “lean all in my bladder” for “ridin’ on my bladder,” which raises far more questions than it answers. And somehow, “cheated on my baby” stayed in.
2. Truth Hurts – Lizzo
Lizzo said she was 100% that b**ch. Kidz Bop made her 100% that kid. “Bad b**ch” became “good friend,” her new man became “new ones,” and “in my DMs” turned into “he already knows my feelings.”
3. Thrift Shop – Macklemore and Ryan Lewis
Kidz Bop cleaned this song so hard that it lost half its resale value. “Big c**k” became “hit song,” “f**king awesome” turned into “really awesome,” and “R. Kelly sheets” were politely swapped for “baseball cleats.”
4. Uptown Funk – Mark Ronson feat. Bruno Mars
Kidz Bop sent the “hood girls” packing and poured water in everyone’s cup. In this makeover, “hot d**n” becomes “hot yeah,” the “freaky” lines get ghosted, and “funk you up” becomes the wildly less exciting “funk it up.”
5. Starships – Nicki Minaj
Kidz Bop stripped Nicki of her expletive-powered freedom anthem and replaced “f**k who you want” with “dance with who you like.” A chaotic girls’ night out turned into a wholesome school dance.
6. GDFR – Flo Rida
Flo Rida’s wild night of “bi chicks” and “ratchets” somehow becomes “high kicks” and (tennis) “rackets.” “Bust it open” is swapped for “come on over,” like we just walked into a fourth-grade pizza party.
7. Blinding Lights – The Weeknd
“Withdrawals” becomes “going through it all,” and “feel your touch” gets swapped for “think too much,” making this less Vegas heartbreak and more middle school insomnia.
8. That’s What I Like – Bruno Mars
“Strawberry champagne on ice” becomes “Strawberry milkshakes, so nice.” Bruno’s bachelor pad has officially been turned into a 1950s diner where the only thing popping is bubblegum.
9. American Boy – Estelle feat. Kanye West
Kanye’s entire verse gets Thanos-snapped out of existence. Meanwhile, Estelle’s “Don't like his baggy jeans, but I might like what's underneath them” is switched to “I like the way he's thinking.”
10. Lucid Dreams – Juice WRLD
Juice WRLD’s emo-rap breakup anthem was already a lot to process. Kidz Bop gave it a full emotional declawing, changing “I love and I hate you” to “I love and I miss you” and turning “dead” into “sad.”
11. Not Myself Tonight – Christina Aguilera
Christina Aguilera’s in-your-face “F**k you” is transformed into “Boo hoo.” Honestly, that sounds a bit more devastating.
12. I’m the One – DJ Khaled feat. Justin Bieber, Quavo, Chance the Rapper, and Lil Wayne
Kidz Bop pulled off the impossible: Converting a song with these guys into something safe for the young ones. Gone are “c**chie melts” and “Gucci belts” — in fact, Weezy’s watered-down verse is all that’s really left.
13. Let It Rock – Kevin Rudolf feat. Lil Wayne
“He stuck his middle finger to the world” becomes “He raised his hand and waved it to the world.” Now, he’s not raging against the system. He’s greeting it politely.
14. U Remind Me – Usher
“Sexing everyone but me” becomes “Sassing everyone and me,” which honestly still stings. But the line “She was on her dream” might be the most meaningless phrase in Kidz Bop history.
15. All of Me – John Legend
Legend’s “Love your curves and all your edges” changed to “Love your words and all your edges.” It’s body-neutral, emotionally respectful, and deeply confusing if you’re trying to dance at a wedding.