Chris Rock ends 'Total Blackout' tour in Brooklyn with jokes about Trump, Rihanna, Michelle Obama
He also joked about keeping every white-colored thing in his house as either hot, heavy, or sharp.
Chris Rock made it count in his hometown last night (December 9). The iconic comedian, one of the most successful and funniest of his generation, ended the U.S. run of his ‘Total Blackout’ tour on Saturday night in his hometown of Brooklyn, N.Y. Rock sold out Brooklyn’s Barclays Center with n triumphant, but irreverent return home to Bedstuy.
The creator of Everybody Hates Chris got love in his backyard, but he joked that Brooklyn is different from the “scary Bed-Stuy” he grew up in. A place where someone threw “a bag of piss” at him, and he inferred that may have been on more than one occasion.
He’s certainly come a long way from then, and the two-time Academy Awards said he knows it. With a backdrop that read “Comfort is the Poison” in bright bold neon colors, Rock told the crowd he knew he finally arrived during his divorce and proceedings from his wife of 16 years, Malaak Compton-Rock. “I realized everybody there was [to] take my money,” he rationalized. “That’s when I knew I arrived.”
Rock’s quest for custody of his children wasn’t any easier. The funnyman had plenty to say about why his marriage failed, listing his infidelity and obsession with pornography among the pitfalls.
“You don’t want to be [the] man in custody court,” he told Brooklyn. The judge gave the actor such a hard time [that] he had to tell him, “I’m Chris Rock, not Chris Brown.”
All is well for the comic legend, however. He was able to get custody of his daughters, and his lifelong mission to “keep them off the pole” is going on without a hitch. He did joke about preparing them to deal with America by keeping anything in his house that is the color white either hot, heavy, or sharp.
When it comes to being single however, Rock, who also played three shows at the Madison Square Garden theatre for three straight days before Brooklyn, isn’t as lucky. He told of a time he tried to kick it to Rihanna and was treated like he was “one of her aunts.” The outspoken Master of Ceremonies did say that “Rihanna is so fine that even if she didn’t sing, she would have the exact same life.”
Rihanna is one of the myriad of stars that has come to see Rock in the last two weeks at his tour stops in L.A. and New York. “New couple alert,” he captioned on an Instagram picture of them backstage.
Eddie Murphy, Madonna, Brad Pitt, Dr. Dre, Jerry Seinfield , Amy Schumer, JB Smooth, Aziz Ansari, Kevin Hart and Nas are all among the stars who have recently come out. Last night, Ice T, Slick Rick and Everybody Hates Chris star Tichina Arnold were in the house.
Speaking of Arnold, Rock joked about her co-star Terry Crews’ recent claims of sexual harassment. Matt Lauer also caught a couple of jabs on the mic. “People are losing careers for grabbing titty in 1996,” Rock quipped.
Donald Trump, police brutality, racism, and lopsided relationships are also among the subjects Rock broached. He warned the men in the building that if they’re in a relationship and get to a point where they can’t provide, they would soon find themselves alone.
“Even Michelle Obama is looking at Barack like, ‘What’s the plan nigga?”” he said with a laugh.
Chris Rock takes his ‘Total Blackout’ tour overseas at the top of January.