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SZA pens emotional response to Grammy nominations

"I remember sobbing on the phone...pleading for the album not to come out 'cause I️ couldn't take the embarrassment."

Artist // Instagram

The fact that SZA is the most-nominated woman of the 2018 Grammys isn't lost on her. In fact, she took to Instagram today, just a day after the nods were announced, to share her history, humility, shock and gratitude. She notes her former financial distress, her fear of disappointing her family, her lack of confidence in the now-gold certified Ctrl, and more. But she ultimately thanks her Top Dawg Entertainment leaders (founder "Top Dawg" and president "Punch"), the Recording Academy, her producers, and her fans. She signs off with a shout-out to her late grandmother: #mygrannynominatedfor5grammys. Read it below.

"I️ remember pretending to be vegan cause that's all I️ could afford lol (chips avocado n salad mix ) I️ remember sleeping on everyone's couch cause I missed the train AGAIN (thank yall for having me lol ) . Sold my beloved 500$ grillz for 50 bucks at the gold shop for train fair( I️ was SICK lol ). I️ BEGGED Punch for writers on this project cus I️ thought no one would ever like me the way I️ was . He said "U don't need em". I️ remember crying cus I️ didn't have any hits or a quantifiable "sound".. I️ remember feeling like damn maybe I suck . maybe I️ should try something else ? Maybe I'm jus wasting space ..Life's weird . I️ Didn't have any friends growing up. never gave my parents an opportunity to say "wow my kids killing it" didn't graduate or do any fly shit before my nana died . been fired from every job I️ ever had ..I remember sobbing on the phone w punch pleading for the album not to come out cause I️ couldn't take the embarrassment . Just wanted another week . Another day ?..he ignored me n said I'd be fine...This entire thing puts my wildest dreams to shame. I️ dunno what to say cause I️ dunno how to accept its even happening to me lol ? I've never won anything in my life even until this week (THANK YOU SOULTRAIN AWARDS!!) it all just feels strange somehow BUT IM SO OVERWHELMINGLY GRATEFUL FOR THIS STRANGENESS!! . I'm so in awe of Gods plan.. I just wanna live up to it. Thank you for listening to me.. thank you for understanding me.. thank u for bonding w my thoughts just the way they were. INFINITE GRATITUDE to the Recording Academy for this INCREDIBLE honor. I️ can't even believe I've been considered. God bless every person who worked on this album or gave it an ear (specially the producers of the century @somethingnebula @iamclang @thankgod4cody ) . Thank you Top and Punch for believing in me no matter what (even when I'm on your LAST nerves ) . Thank u RCA for giving me new wings THANK YOU GOD FOR THIS LIFE I️ DONT UNDERSTAND . #Ctrl.. a concept . [#mygrannynominatedfor5grammys #TDE."

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